http://www.nytimes.com/2008/11/28/us...html?th&emc=th

I may blog on this subject later today. It raises some interesting issues for all websites, but especially for hookup sites like our own.

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I always try to be truthful on my profile. But some profiles don't ask for year of birth, and there have been times when I just didn't keep my age up to date. Is that lying?

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Few people think to update their age and, in fact, many websites automatically add a year to your age every year based on the data you initially gave them. That is why you sometimes see a guy online who has a profile that says he is 25 and a headline that says something like 'Hot 22 year-old Ready to Play'.

Is there anything wrong with misleading others about your age? It is a thing people have done long before we had the Internet. I actually lied to my boyfriend about my age for years, only telling him my real age (it was off by 2 years) when he was in the hospital sick and I felt I needed to "come clean." He just laughed.

For me, personally, I just find it annoying when someone says they are one age and then shows up looking like someone who clearly is NOT the represented age. It isn't that they may lie about their year of birth. But to lie and then think they can get away with it even though they clearly don't look that age is really a pisser -- especially if they're standing in your door, ready to come inside to have sex. Not a great way to get the action going! Pretty galling, really, don't you think!?

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I'd be happy if guys would just read the damn profiles on this and other similar sites when all the stats are there even if the age is a bit off by a couple of years. It's annoying to pay for the bandwidth with endless A/S/L chat that eventually ends up with no hookup.

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5'9", 160#, S&P brown hair/blue eyes, 7" cut, 52yo, HIV neg. Mostly top but can be versatile.

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Being too lazy to bother to read a profile is a very common practice. Some guys, though, may like the endless chatter because it is a way to stay in touch, to actually communicate with other people from their homes. Just maybe?

As for liars, those I really really get angry about are escorts. I mean, come on! You want to charge someone for your services and you have the nerve to show up looking considerably different than your pictures? That is one reason I monitor escort sites just to see if "X" is still using the same pics today he was using when I first noticed him back 5 years ago.

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Need cash? Ask me how!

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IMHE, guys hooking up on the net mostly know what to do.

You automatically add a few years to their stated age, subtract couple of inches from the length of their endowment, add a bit more of body fat to the ridiculous numbers stated; understand that the pix have been very heavily photoshopped, if they are real in the first place, and continue playing the game. In all honesty, cheating on the web when it comes to the stats, is a universal fact of life. It is something that comes with the othewise very comfy territory of keyboard surfing. That's the drawback attached to it and though huge numbers of gay dudes are all wired, gay bars and gay cruising for sex is well and thriving. No wonder...

Now, most of us can also get going and meet people out there in the real world, where WYSIWYG applies fully and where you can decide for yourself, if the dude at hand is hot (in your books) or not.

If I am looking for 'a quick romp', e-mailing, chatting and all is just not worth the trouble. I'd rather go out any hunt my men down.

If I am trying to make friends, develop relationships, etc., I'd include web dating into the process.

Why?

A number of guys do not cruise for whatever their reasons may be. And even if they do, they find it impossible to see you as an interesting (possibly a long-term) partner, if your friendship started in the bushes or in the backroom. For all I care, they are probably dead wrong on that one, but that's how some people behave and because you want to make sure that your search has the best chances of succeeding, you hit the keys, don't you?

KD

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