Caught in between??
 

I have a problem: I am a 62 years old white gay male and I am fairly young looking, kind of like an older geek nerd type guy. I am in excellent physical condition due to working out and mountian biking. My "problem" is that I am attracted to younger looking guys 20's -40's but the guys that age who are interested in older guys want a macho burly "daddy type" or a silver hair "grandpa type" guy . I am totally unattracted to guys my age or in some cases 10-15 years YOUNGER who are these types and most of the younger guys want guys their own ages which is totally understandable. I was wondering if any other guys are in this same situation? Any comments would be very appreciated. Thanks

no one wants my type
 

I know what you are talking about as i'm a big bear and like younger guy's 20/40yrs. old. but no one seems to be interested in older bears. i'm not a daddy bear so i hear where you are coming from.

I guess I've just decided that the only way I'm going to enjoy the company of the kind of young men I like is to provide them an incentive. They've got something I want -- to be around their hot, youthful, firm bodies -- and I've got something many of them need -- cash -- so maybe that is way it must be. Of course that means you usually must "settle" for one timers and not long term which is really regretable (sometimes), but I can't say that I'm especially lonely and seeking a long-term relationship right now. I have friends and family for that.

My partner is 24 years younger than I am and recently let it slip that he viewed me as something like a daddy. I freaked. I'm not into the daddy/son role. For me I want equality, but that does pose an interesting question: can you be equals when there is such a difference in experience, wealth, etc?

Caught...
 

You have perceived your situation with the greatest accuracy. Yup, if they are not into their own peers, the 20's-40's dudes are into the few types of daddies and that pretty much does it for them.

Do yourself a favor and try to lighten up both your image and your search parameters. You may want to re-invent yourself a bit. Tone down the nerdo-geekish component a bit and emphasize the mountain biking and outdoors adventures of a sharing, successful dude.

We all have our very preferred types. Yet, making your search (parameters) all too specific will turn down far too many guys, including the ones who share the same interests with you, since they are very likely to perceive you as someone who might ONLY be interested in superhero games or as someone who is ONLY interested in former Boy Scout dudes. You never said that, but that is how you are perceived, if you get too specific all-too-soon.

The guys you are after know only too well that they are a very sought after bunch these days. We all ought to agree with generous2u here. Most of these dudes both need and want an incentive. And such incentives do tend to have a price tag attached to them as well. When it comes to such matters, you want to stay as cool-headed as you possibly can be. If 'rompin' in the hay' is all you really want, few f***buddies with benefits will do nicely. Keep it quiet; down to earth and simple. It works like a charm.

If you are looking for a LTR, you need to find a suitable guy who wants to take the ride with you and who must be motivated in an entirely different fashion. Most guys I have met so far have a price tag attached to them. Yet, to believe that the price tage attached is always a simple € or $ figure is plainly wrong. Showing them that there are ample rewards of all kinds, if they get attached to you will do miracles with some guys. The others will not care at all. People do happen to be very different. My BF said that once we got together, the gates to a world above his glass ceiling opened wide and he was able to do the things that used to be entirely beyond his realm of imagination. That completely 'new quality of life' was his chief incentive.

The concept of simple equality may not work too well with two guys who belong to the two vastly different age groups. If you are much older than your BF, you will be his 'Daddy' one way or the other, spokenly or unspokenly so. That comes with the territory. You do not want to spend to much time brooding over this. You want to stay independent while trying to help him develop and grow. Very soon, rather than going through the equality matters, you'll be naturally discovering what is that you are good at on an individual basis. So, you'll take over such matters and leave his matters to him. The little 'specialized fields' will show up and you'll start playing as a team. This will both enhance and secure your relationship.

KD

hello almsot 59 in calif
 

bimarried cocksucker full bottom rob central calif 559 area code. iam almost 59 6ft1180, work out all the time. wanted to say, wants wrong guys with getting togther with guys are own age? i find the younger guys are lets say lol, to be nice here a pain in the butt? full of cow chips??? cant be trusted??? tell you anything. ok hows this? they come on and say "WHATS UP" what the hell does that mean lol???? dont they know whats up???
or how about this one???? " ASL SOMETHING?"" out of the clear blue? i ask is that your new d/d? may i should say "" whats up"" back:> o well not mean will suck and let guys fuck me my age older thansk rob the slave in calif.

Before you get all upset about those younger guys, why don't you stop and ask yourself why an almost-59 year-old man doesn't feel a need to apply basic rules of writing when he puts himself out there like this. That is more annoying to me than any kid who may be communicating differently because the kid and I have a generation gap (or two) between us.

to the luvchild mr32 in new york
 

just got your note?????? back i guess it meant something to you? but not me? if you mean my spelling lol yep guilty here two collge degrees retired young but cant spell worth a dam and dont care either. with out spell check that is, my opoint is still the same, being a kid yourself i see you dont get it????? " should i say whats up""""" or how about no """ noo drama>>>>>>> i love that one lol. you kids love the head games thanks for the comic relief and proving my point. dont work to hard if you do worK lol bye

The only thing I've proven is that you're an example of how pathetic things have gotten. A grown man feels no sense of shame, in fact you seem proud about your ignorance. By the way, why don't you use the built in spell check of this board?

to love child 32 my new buddie
 

buddies and i from Nam have been sitting here reading your wonderful posts grin:> trying to decide weather your a hurt job? or a comic book character? well guess what will poll all the feeders in the area and then report back at some point. why break up this wonderful Buddie ,young wet behind the balls meaning you? and the old fart me relationship???????????????????

i was working in the city lol before you were born lol??? you do know the city right??????? OK kiddie will get back with you, others join in Nam guys here love it. old fart cocksucker rob reporting from Calif . hey maybe a website with a column next???????????????????????????

Palm Spings, CA is very good for older men/younger guys. I see it all the time at the CCBC gay resort and Barracks bar
Also, the Eagle and Faultline in Los Angeles as well.