help please; I'm missing something...
 

I'm new at this site, and will be new in Thailand at the end of the month. I hope I'm missing something because, after spending 2 hours reading through threads, I found out that the vast majority of them are negative or unenthusiastic.
I'll be visiting Bangkok, Chinag Mai and Phuket (which is unmentioned in the threads). I'd appreciate recommendations on where to find authentic (as in no straight guys) and honest (as in no squeazing extra money after the act) and clean sex-for-pay in bars/saunas/massage places.
In CM, I'd be interested in finding a boy who can also double as a tourist guide/driver.
And two additional questions:
1) Are there bars where they do BJ at the bar itself?
2) Is it acceptable to view and/or grope the package before deciding?

Thanks.

While I can understand first-timer's jitters, I do think the discussions on this forum are reflective of reality. The reality is that there are no guarantees, when what you seem to be asking for in your questions are guarantees.

Authentic (as in not straight)? - Thai culture does not have the gay-straight divide as in the West. Even if they understand the gay-straight divide from Western thinking, they are working boys, they may not be truthful. Even if they are, some straight boys perform better in bed than gay boys.

Honest? - They are working boys. What do you expect?

Clean? - They are working boys. What do you expect? You take your own precautions.

Double as a tourist guide? - The typical working boy in Chiangmai speaks Thai badly (because he's not Thai, but Burmese) and English not at all. Secondly, he knows no more than one-tenth of what you can glean from a Lonely Planet Guide.

Re your additional questions:
They are humans, please treat others with respect.

It will seem a little bewildering the first time, but it's not hard to learn the ins and outs of the Thai commercial sex scene. Relax, watch what others do (or don't do) and you will enjoy yourself.

I agree 100% with SLOOT. Treat the boys with respect , don t violate their dignity and you likely will get back the same in return. At least that s my experience . So no need to answer your additional questions . Phuket: There are several go go bars in the Paradise Complex. I met a boy who answers your descreption of the boys y r looking for perfectly in one of these bars. One of the most valuable persons I ve ever met in my life. We ve never been "boyfriends" but we have turned from "business partners" to very , very close friends now over the years. When you are in Puket DO NOT miss the Boat Bar ,located at the Paradise C. They have 2 different shows every evening , every day. NO "F" shows (thank god) but great dancers and it is always much fun ,too. You will find many tourists there, gay Thais beyond the commercial scene and bar boys who go there after closing times.

Maybe stay in Bangkok and meet a guy there who can go with you to Chiang Mai and Phuket (be your tour guide). I think you'll find it easier to meet guys in Bangkok than other places.

If you go to Phuket, I don't recommend you take the boat trip to Phi Phi Island. I got violently sea sick as did most of the other people on the boat--but that was during rough rainy season in July.

hello, wantasian, my exp. from some 22 yrs:
1.the case they want/ask for more money etc after is very, very slim. In fact I have hardly ever ''made a price'' beforehand and was also hardly ever disappointed in this respect.
2.Hiring a boy in BKK to ''guide'' you is nonsense. Really, It has nothing to add to the trip-except that he can read+speak Thai (often badly/low class) and Lao=the local isan dialect. As these all are very big tourist towns-english (and often JPNese) will get you by. Most of the working boys in BKk hail from Isan and have never been to CMai-and dont know anything about it=make them of no use for guiding. Besdies-remember that old ado: you have not been to XYX if you have not tasted the boy from XYZ?
3.what mr. sloot wrote about Cmai boys is not the norm-in fact IF he is Burmese-then he is much more likely to speak passable english. Mr. sloot is more likely to refer to the ''chao doy''=hilltribe people, who seem to have taken over a lot of the trade there.
4.agree what all above wrote-treat the boys with normal courtesy and respect-and youll get heaps in return. A simple applied common sense and some experience makes weeding out the rotten apples also much more easier.

I suspect that is because the majority of those who post actually live here and, like me, sometimes wish things could be back as they were 20 or even 30 years ago when the whole gay scene seemed so much more fun. But I have often taken visiting friends around some bars and massage places, and they are inevitably in awe of Thailand and its gay scene. It's so different to almost anywhere else in the world. Just come and enjoy it. Follow the "rules" posted above and you will have a great time. But remember this is not America, nor Britain, nor Australia nor anywhere else in the world. Local culture and tradition dictate much of what goes on in daily life, and that includes nightlife. So please respect them - and the boys.

I think you can look for guy in CM if you would like to visit then he can help you about to show you about city and guide but might to contat and chat with him for awhile and know him. Maybe you can ask your friends, who visited CM and knew someone there.

If you come to BKK and look for guy and go to CM with might be last choice if that guy is nice and you would like to travel with him and yes you might think about cost to travel with him.

you say: no straight guy. But the difference between gay and straight is in Thailand not as it is in Europe or America. Last time I offed a boy in Pattya, he was straight, but he was the best sucker I've ever had.

I've noticed that, too! Some of the best suckers I've ever had (here in the U.S. and a few times in Thailand) were straight/masculine (married, good-looking, with children). Almost all fems are bad suckers (except, oddly, very young ones).

Last January, I talked with a regular German tourist, and he said Phuket has turned ugly (unbelievable greediness). He says he's not going there anymore. For example, he was in a sauna and touched someone and they wanted 200 baht. He said it's money-hungriness like you wouldn't believe. Maybe at that time, their tourism was way down, and they were getting ugly. But I believe tourism is still way down all over Thailand.