Thanks for expounding and in fact I agree with much of what you say. I would never suggest for example that a drunk driver who hurts or kills a person with his vehicle should be excused from criminal charges because he or she "had a poor upbringing" or a troubled youth. This case and so many others appear more like two drunk drivers hitting each other. And I really do presume that the guy in question was on drugs, so to panic after the fact seems ludicrous. What did he expect? he had raw anal sex at the Black party with someone he didn't know. I just worry that HIV transmission among gay men today may lead to quarantines, crackdowns, greater divides between poz and negative gay men and blanket condemnation of gay sex all around, when the sad awareness of it can contribute instead to greater caring and more personal accountability, as you say. My friend's policy of always wearing a condom when fucking anonymously is most effective. My personal preference for blow jobs, where I run the risk, and gloved anal, saves my ass. Our airing of these issues helps raise awareness - and I'd say especially how you've phrased it - of the deadly responsibility involved in anonymous sex encounters.