Alright, I have to apologise here. I've been trying but I still haven't found sex again.
I am feeling strange inside. I am so horny that I thought to go to the sauna and park my ass in an open room and be a public toilet as Snakeboy used to say. That's a nasty thing to say. Heh, now I can understand why they do it.
Went to the cruising places and found mostly the same guys. Sure I could get laid if I just drop my pants but I had to remind myself a lousy fuck is worse than no fuck. Bumped into the S&M couple. One of them was baretop and attracting quite some interest. I thought they'll have no problem getting some fly into their dungeon.
And the jerk with his fuck buddies were there. That greatly spoilt my night because they seem to be watching people closely for some juicy gossips. Fortunately they haven't heard about Eric and me. Or actually Patrick and me.
You see, I was really horny out of my mind. I remembered he was the one who hunted me down initially. There must be something about me that turned him on for sure. And we only had sex once, he couldn't be tired of me so soon. So I looked up the phone book and called the hostel. I asked for Eric of room #### and no such person. Then I thought I call again and asked for Patrick *** since I know his dad's surname. Bingo, that's him but I could only leave a message but I didn't.
It's confirmed that he's my ex-gf's kid. I was not really as down because I was already quite sure but still this confirmation was kind of sad.
Tried calling BC but got transfered to voice machine. Is he screening me out? Wonder if my excuse the last time was really so lame that he's mad at me. But so far he never said so directly. I wonder if I can do anything to get him back like money and sex? Money I don't have. Sex? well I am his used property. I was hoping it won't happen but maybe he already had fresh meat. I thought maybe a 3some with MK and BC using my top and bottomends would be nice. Hell, I am daydreaming again. The likely outcome would be MK and me would be used by BC.
I wouldn't want to lose lose MK when he start exploring his bisexuality. But I know it's no use trying to stop MK. I know he will do it when it's his fate to meet the right man. I was almost that man but he's still holding out for a more dominating top like BC to nail his ass.
Same thing at the saunas. Same folks and plenty of open rooms with bare ass for the taking. Wonder where's Snakeboy? Heard he's got a bf. Likely story but I would give him a few months before he start wandering for other cocks to suck.
Went to the video room but I was not interested to get sucked. Gotta keep my load in case I meet the right guy. Bad things happen again as before. Found a nice guy and was cruising him. Only to see a big guy took him to a room and I could hear him getting pounded to heaven inside. I mean I cruised the wrong guy and totally missed out noticing that big guy. I was jealous and frustrated that the happily getting fucked guy could have been me. I know my frustration showed because this little guy was standing beside me and having his hand inside my towel and up my ass. Had to pull his hand out to leave me alone.
Totally frustrated, went to the dark room to barely see guys get fucked. Got me more horny. Hands were groping and pulled off my towel. Got an ass that tried to push onto my cock but no condom so I pushed him away. Then felt a wet tongue at my ass and when he felt my well lubed ass, he tried to pull me out to get a room. I said no. His tongue worked harder but I was not in the mood and walked out.
He's a chubby middle aged and he began stalking me. I know my lubed ass was telling him I was horny as hell and was already prepared for penetration by the right man. He was hoping to be there when I lowered my resistance. The famous sauna saying, the longer you stay the more desperate you'll get. It's true. He flashed a nice big cock a few times at me. It looked hotter each time I looked. At least it's attached to a live man and better than a dildo. I felt my resistance getting lowered. I went to the steam room and found him fingering a sissy looking guy. My bad timing so I quickly left. He followed leaving the guy.
The only way to shake him off was to shower and leave quickly. I was already quite prepared to be taken by him. I went to the steam room to let him have his chance to make his move. Heh, I don't just drop my towel and bend over for a stranger unless he already dominated me before. I already had the whole drama imagined in my mind. Then seeing him make the same moves on another guy inside made me felt dumb.
Still no sex.
Finding the right man for sex doesn't happen just like that. It happened like some strange stories. My ex-bf, BC, MK and Patrick. I wonder if it will happen soon again.
Of course I've also told about the times when things didn't happen right but I wanted something to happen so I went for it and regretted later. All it got me that time was to be considered cheap and the male easy Suzie. If nothing happened soon, I think I may again be putting out my ass like easy Suzie again. I fucking need a fucking man fucking my fucking ass soon or I'll go fucking nuts soon. Or Ill swear I'll put out for the first man who puts his hand on my bottom.
God, I'm fucking nuts. All these hunting and wondering is wearing out my patience. I need a hard drink to calm down.
Later...
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