Seems to me that there is less and less kissing going on lately, as compared to days gone by, at least in my experience. I remember one of the very first guys who ever took me back to his place when I was young. Crappy, tiny studio apartment... we climbed into his bed and spent almost the entire time kissing naked, with little emphasis on anything else. Very hot. I miss that.
Here are a few reasons off the top of my head why some guys don't kiss, or at least don't do it often:
As already stated, it is too intimate for some. We can psychoanalyze this and have fun with it... but I'm not in the mood for that right now.
Some guys only kiss guys they care about. This isn't the same as kissing being too intimate or making a guy feel "too gay" or whatever. It's just a matter of a guy wanting to share this particular thing only with a guy toward whom he feels some sort of emotional attachment.
For some, it may seem "inappropriate" in a bookstore-type environment -- they may think the sex here should remain "down and dirty."
Many guys smoke in bookstore backrooms (if permitted and sometimes even if it is not), and some non-smokers don't want to even take a chance at maybe ending up kissing a guy who smokes, whether they have seen him with a cigarette or not. And of course, don't forget: if you are a smoker today, you are the spawn of Satan, too.
In addition to smoking, sometimes you may kiss a dude and suddenly realize his mouth tastes like the Kung Pow Chicken he had for lunch three hours earlier. And once you've started... it's kind of hard to push him away and stop -- or at the very least, awkward to do so.
Previous bad-kisser encounters. This can make a dude reluctant to try again. Without question, the single WORST kisser I ever met in my entire life was in a bookstore. Everything about the guy was OK at first glance. Then he gets me into a tiny booth and just fucking pins me up on the wall. He was a few inches taller, and I have this vivid memory of his head bearing down on me. The dude opened his mouth -- really, really wide. It was like looking into the maw of a great white shark. His tongue came out and started dancing around long before he got near my face. Oh, fuck... it was so horrible. In retrospect, it's a funny image, but at the time... just terrifying. He clamped onto my mouth and put his hand behind my head, that slimy, undulating tongue poking at where my tonsils would be if I still had them. He was breathing into my lungs as if I needed CPR, and drool was running from his mouth onto my chin. I won't even tell you what he tried to do to my lips. It was all a HUGE let-down. I was so turned off I had to leave. I can't recall how I got out of it, but it was, as I suggested, rather awkward. I did manage to escape with my uvula undamaged, however. So clearly... this is a bad experience that I would not want to repeat, though in reality: I can't imagine that I could ever possibly meet a guy who is THAT bad at kissing again. At least I pray that no such man exists...
Some guys just want sex without any frills. Dick to mouth, mouth to dick, let's cum and get the fuck out of here kind of thing. And there's nothing wrong with that, it just depends upon the mood of the participants.
In a bookstore, you MAY be kissing a guy who has just rimmed someone else's ass -- sucked another dick -- or swallowed another man's cum. While this doesn't bother some guys, it turns off plenty of others.
I'm betting that the level of attraction between two men is another very good reason why kissing doesn't happen as much in cruising situations. Let's be honest, guys: most of us will "allow" someone to suck our dick even if we're not completely into that guy. But we may not wish to get any more intimate than that. I'll admit it myself -- some guys I am not completely attracted to. They may be nice guys, great cocksuckers, good dudes overall... but they don't have a face I WANT to kiss. I'd feel no passion in doing so... so why bother? If we can both get off on some fellatio... fine. But if he tried to kiss me and I didn't want it, I'd have to decline.
And finally... when you are in a situation where there are all these variables and little doubts about what is appropriate, what does the other guy want, is this too much, is this too little, etc., sometimes it is just easier to go with the flow. If one guy doesn't make a move, the other guy won't, either. Fear of having a kiss rejected is bothersome to many guys. This is, in fact, something I have considered myself from time to time. If a guy comes into a booth with me, it's obvious he wants SOMETHING. Usually this something is to suck my dick. So at the very least, I will end up with an encounter I enjoy. I KNOW he is interested -- but HOW interested is he? That's the question. Does he JUST want dick? Is he a married or bi guy who is afraid to kiss another man? Would seeing me with a cigarette turn him off? If I attempted to kiss him, would he push me away? If I get pushed away, would this ruin my enthusiasm for the rest of the encounter? And all the same applies the other way around: he may want to kiss me and be thinking the very same stuff.
So sometimes... men just avoid kissing completely. Easier to get a dick in your mouth at an ABS than anything else, most of the time. Kissing is made to be an added "complication" to a situation that could otherwise be cut and dry.
And really... that's a damn shame.
The best advice is from Corey: be prepared to be rejected, don't take it the wrong way, and just go for it. ONE of you has to make the first move to kiss. If the guy doesn't do it soon enough to satisfy you, go for it yourself.
All that analysis, however, while pretty much on the money, I think, is no cause for despair: I've kissed LOTS of great guys in bookstores (and parking lots and beaches and public parks and cemeteries and elevator shaft control rooms and public bathrooms and in the woods and on a tennis court and in a jacuzzi and...). I had one really hot encounter with a dude which involved NO penises at all. We just took our shirts and hugged, kissed and massaged each other in a booth for a LONG time. There was a crowd of jealous dudes standing outside listening when we finally left, too.
Also, to be perfectly honest, I have rarely been turned down for a kiss. This has nothing to do with illusions of me being so hot that everyone wants to kiss me, but I think it has to do with the OTHER possible reaction you may get from offering a kiss: a guy may placate you with a BIT of a kiss to see where he wants to take it -- or to just put an end to it and get on with whatever it is he wants most. Kiss a bit, tentatively, satisfy the guy a little, then move on to his dick. But more often than not, once started, a "test kiss" usually leads to more passionate making out.
I'm with you, dude. Kissing a guy mutually attracted to you is fucking HOT. Men taste GREAT. I'd be EASILY 70% sexually satisfied if I had a nice guy to kiss all the time. I can get by without my dick getting off. I miss the intimacy. I can kiss a dude for hours. Been craving that for a long time, too. This topic is a personal pet peeve of mine, in fact.
Guys... get kissing each other, for crying out loud!
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