After spending time in the ABSs, one tends to get a feel for things. MOST of the time, after careful observation, you can usually tell who is looking for WHAT. Consequently you can do your best to avoid men who aren't your cup of tea.

Yet no matter how good we might get at picking up signals and non-verbal cues, sooner or later we are going to get surprised and sooner or later we are going to run into an asswipe.

I sure don't think you were discreet or subtle at ALL. I think there are many ways you could have handled it. I, for one, would have told the guy: "If you don't let go of my dick right this fucking second I'm going to yell out that you are trying to rape me and then I'm going to make sure the cops haul your ass to jail."

That would usually do the trick.

However, I realize that having your dick and balls in a vise-grip tends to take the steam out of any well-thought response.

The reality is... odds are good that most dudes are NOT going to cause you any serious harm. If your dick is soft, especially, you would certainly recover from a little abuse if it were to happen. If you were hard -- well, he's getting the wrong idea based on your erection alone and a broken penis is a very real possibility, in which case I'd also take a more careful approach and try to avoid threats.

I've ditched NUMEROUS asswipes by simply speaking LOUDLY in a bookstore. Once you have drawn the attention of the other patrons in this VERY public place, odds are good you will be left alone.

But... what's done is done. I DO agree the final kick was not necessary -- and could, in fact, land YOU AND HIM in jail. Shoving him could be defended as self-defense. Kicking a man who is already down -- that's assault.

So don't do that anymore.

I've gone to bookstores in many states, cruised many unfamiliar locations. "When in Rome..." I find the best way to get a handle on how things go down in new places is to observe a little bit first.

Generally speaking, however -- it almost always goes down the same way in just about all bookstores.

The reality is also that it is pretty damn hard to be truly raped AND be the top! The guy seriously could NOT force you to fuck him.

Another GREAT exit strategy (tell Bush) would be to LIE. Agree with him: "OK, man. Bend over and I'll fuck you."

Bingo. When he's let go of your dick, has his pants around his ankles and is bent over -- you walk out and away!

Now, that was pretty simple, huh? I'm surprised no one else thought of that.

I've frequently told men: "NO means NO." Most get that, but it seems your case was extraordinary in many respects.

Learn the signals, learn the atmosphere, learn the clientèle, do NOT be afraid.

One final thought, as a last resort. This phrase will generally get anyone to leave you alone: "I have herpes, sorry."

Or feel free to insert the STD of your choice.