My own experience with the baths (fairly limited, but by no means a novice) concurs with the above: you cannot avoid trolls, you cannot entirely find any means to avoid a few awkward situations.
This is part of cruising, no matter what the location.
The guy who JOKINGLY told you to stop being such a wuss is right on the money. It is totally up to YOU to handle yourself in whatever way you see fit.
Of course, it is always best to be POLITE. Piss off the wrong person and you can easily ruin the rest of your time there. Nasty queens... you know the deal.
No means NO. Simple.
I've found all sorts of rude and obnoxious men at the baths -- and lots of great guys, too.
Some dudes will walk right into your room without waiting for an invitation. Just shoo them away. I've seen dudes stalk the hallways and open every cracked door, flip on the light, check out the guy, then either walk away if they don't dig him or force themselves into the room. These guys are generally detested by all who are NOT like them.
But don't let this scare you. MOST men "get" the unspoken rules and behave like mature adults, understanding that sexual attraction varies and part of the fun is finding the right dude.
The standard line oft-used to tell someone to exit your room is: "Just resting right now, dude."
Doesn't matter if you're laying there with a hard dick. He'll get the gist of it.
When jerking off in public areas like the sauna or hot tub or whatever, you simply have to expect that you might get groped. You can easily brush someone's hand away if you don't want that. If you just want to watch, keep covered a bit. Some guys will NOT tolerate a lurker watching them. They either want you to participate or leave. You'll know what they think and can act accordingly. Most men having sex in the sauna don't mind being watched -- it is par for the course and sort of silly to get annoyed at other guys watching. If they wanted privacy, they can go to a room.
There's no magic answer -- you just have to learn the ropes and the specific signals that happen in YOUR local bath. Like someone else said, it is often different depending on the venue.
The advice I always give to anyone checking out a new location has remained unchanged: watch and observe and take mental notes as to what everyone else is doing. You'll find out what is acceptable behavior and what is not.
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