-- My Enthusiastic & Am. Friend and I arr'd. at our usual conession at around
1911oo.hrs.;
Khun Nat - the concession-holder's factotum - wasn't there, so we made do with the svces. of his assts. instead;
- At approx.
12.15.hrs. my E&AF. noticed a small procession of
Pattaya's Finest,
four on their m/s. and
one PU., driving-along the small & brick-surfaced rd. that separates the beach from the beach-front ptys. and in the gen'l. dir'n. of the tall tower with its
two cable-cars;
- All of a sudden a comotion as a young & male ice-cream vendor dashed between our concession and the neighboring one with one of
Pattaya's Finest, obviously one of the younger & LESS paunchy members, in hot pursuit. The YM. ran straight into the sea to above his chest, but managing to keep his p'styrene. box, with its ice-creams, balanced on his shoulder. The
police-man halted at the water's edge, waited for several moments before turning-around and walking-back, smiling ruefully; we spectators were smiling a bit MORE broadly as it was all too obvious with whom our sympathies lay.
- The YM. stayed in the water for quite some time and then made his way, still in the sea, away from the dir'n. taken by the
police, who, after some half-an-hour, were seen ret'g. whithersoever;
- After a further
40 or so mins. the ice-cream vendors re-appeared; we were given to u'stand. that
Pattaya's Finest were trying to shake-down each one of them for a
200.Bh. donation!
-- As an aside I was reminded of a long winded story that began with the Capt'n. of the
USS. Constitution saying to some young matelot, clad only in his skivvies:
'Son, son, what are you doing standing here on the quarter-deck of the USS. Constitution, lad only in your skivvies, and in the cold clear light of the early American dawn?'.
- The matelot had picked-up some girl or other in a bar and they had ret'd. to her house for some
nookie.
- But then, quite unexpectedly, who should return but her husband:
'Least-wise so I surmised from his opening remarks wch. went something like this: "Git outa ma wife, git outa ma bed and git outa a ma house.";
-
'So I got outa his wife, I got outa his bed and I got outa his house by jumping through the open window, pursued by the irate husband, or least-wise so I surmised from the opening remarks of the crowd wch. went stg. like this: "Run, run, hairy bum, there's a man chasing you with a large carving knife just one inch from your left testicle!";
- During the pursuit he nearly tripped-over a cat:
'Or least-wise so I surmised from the opening remarks of the crowd wch. went stg. like this: "Get outa his way, you furry four-legged f*cker, and let them that's gotta run, run!";
- Various other adventures & would-be mishaps ensued until at last the young matelot concluded by saying: "
So you see, sir, that's how I come to be standing on the quarter-deck of the USS Constitution, lad only in my skivvies, and in cool clear light of the early American dawn.".
-- Apologies for the a/m. digression.
--
