Quote:
Originally Posted by jonn3
In many ways for some guys growing up was sort of like the olden days of men at sea - they did not have any options but could not go for months and months with nothing.
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I saw this and it reminded me of when I came out to my father, a retired Air Force Lt. Colonel with 32 years in the service going back to WWII. He told me it was OK and that he "knew guys" who did this from years back.
This was when he and his girlfriend (complicated, he and my mother never divorced for both pragmatic and personal reasons) visited me in DC. I took them to a gay bar/restaurant and to other essentially gay resturants, we went to Dignity's "Mass for the Gay and Lesbian Community," and if either was taken aback by anything they never said so to me.
To take this from the personal to possibly more universal, there are "worldly" men who know these things and accept them as part of life. A lot of military guys from my Dad's generation basically knew the score and, although conservative in the range from Barry Goldwater to Gerald Ford to George H.W. Bush (at least before Reagan and the Moral Majority, etc.), they were personally often more open-minded and sometimes advocated what are now considered liberal positions on social issues.
Thus, Houston's current lesbian Mayor Annise Parker, who came out and was a public activist from college onward, was still able to work for Republican Rob Mosbacher's energy company for 18 years. Although Parker, just as I am, is a Democrat and LGBTetc., she could be there and advance even while Mosbacher worked for Bush's campaigns and later entered his Cabinet and she contiunied local political activities and activism in Houston.
To me it's a shame the current political climate seems so divided and unforgiving, accentuated by social media, 24-hour-news, and more. I want to believe that more people are flexible and understanding when they get down to person-to-person interaction.
Perhaps that goes even more so for those who for whatever reason must live double lives. LGBTetc. people sometimes shame or pressure people to sort of "make a choice" or come out and essentially label themselves as something or other. I prefer to start with the person, whoever they are, wherever they feel comfortable, first. I want to listen rather than lecture and speak from my own experience rather than tell people what to do with theirs.
But that's just me, others can agree or disagree. I so far behind on work and site updates await.