There was a degree of safety in the days when it was not as stigmatized as in the more distant past - but before it was so accepted and out in the open.
We could play around but we knew no one would tell - no one would know. We were not forced to acknowledge anything before we were ready to accept it.
Now there are Junior High Schools with "Gay - Straight Alliance Clubs" - and sure it is a great resource for those who want it - but it also is saying "you need to make a choice now".
I know growing up there were a lot of guys that played around to some degree - some were gay - some were bi - but most were just horny and needed an outlet.
When we fooled around neither of us thought of it as a relationship or even gay sex - we just wanted sex - and we wanted to make sure no one ever knew.
I think the confidence that no one would tell gave a lot of guys the courage to try it - some would try it once - other might do it for years - but they knew they could walk away at any time and not worry about being judged or stereotyped.
These days if I run into some I know at a gay bar or something I have to worry that if I run into him at work he will just talk about like it is no big deal - and as far as I am concerned it is no ones business.
I know that is just because of my generation - growing up when it was not OK to be gay or bi - but that is part of who I am.
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