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Originally Posted by jonn3
Growing up being naked around other guys was thought of as "no big deal".
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I am sure that it was actually a BIG deal for each and everyone of us on a purely individual level. Yet, we were clearly told that this how generations before us played sports and showered, and how generations after us would play sports and shower, too. Most importantly, the group showers, and a common, all male locker room applied to ALL guys. No one was being singled out or treated any differently. Since we were all in it on equal terms, none of it was any big deal at all.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jonn3
Then came Junior High. Gym class was mixed grades 7 - 9 and showers were mandatory. They actually checked off our names as we got our towels. The teacher made it clear - not showering after gym was unhygienic, gross and smelly - and everyone would shower.
Sure it was awkward at first - being 7th graders some guys had not started puberty at all - I remember the first day we showered a good friend of mine where I was about 8 - 10 inches taller than him - well when it came time to shower I learned quickly that height does not equal development! There I was so much taller but he was much bigger and hairy.
The first few classes were very awkward, but it was almost like tearing a band aid off - better to do it quick and get it over with.
Sure I was nervous - afraid I would stare or get hard - but thankfully frequent masturbation - fear - and never washing below the waste kept that from being a problem. And when some guys did get hard no one gave them too much grief.
We just learned to deal with it and we "got over it". By 8th and 9th grade no one thought a thing about it except for some laughing about the hairless 7th graders trying not to be seen. But it was part of growing up.
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Yup, the pubic hair was inevitably an issue. My best buddy and I were the first in our class to spurt out some, so the rest of the guys were looking at us with a degree of envy. Couple of weeks later, two or three other dudes had some hair to show, too, so everyone shrugged with their shoulders, and moved on. But we remembered very clearly not to tease the hairless dudes ever.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jonn3
I think if they somehow said "it is ok to be naked at 18 but not before" it would have been even more awkward - it makes it more of a "big deal" when in fact it is uncomfortable at first - but it is not something that will scar you for life.
A friend of mine teaches middle school - she talks about the STENCH of the kids after gym - they reek of AX body spray that the soak themselves in to cover up the perspiration - she was also talking about how many kids get busted "sexting" and how funny it is - the boy thinks nothing of taking a picture of his penis and sending it around for people to see - but if he was told he had to shower with the other boys he would freak.
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The idea here was that if being naked with your peers of the same gender in the lockers and showers scarred you - YOU had a problem. The system has worked pretty well for the vast majority of people, and the very few who had an issue with it, had to deal with their issues on a personal level.
There are folks who get sick whenever they have to sit at back of the bus. It is a commonly known fact. Yet no one has started building the buses with 60 front seats, and no one has started widening the highways to accommodate for such buses either. Buses work for a vast majority of people. Those who are not comfortable using them try to use alternatives or take pills or deal with it on a personal level.
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Now, add all the sexting scandals going on to the equation, and you realize that by changing the rules to in favor of the vocal minority with a very strong sense of self-entitlement, the things inevitably got actually much worse for almost everyone.
Yup. We were checking each other out. Men simply do that. Str8, bi, gay, undetermined. WYSIWYG. So, after couple of group showers everyone knew the lay of the land ahead, and topic was closed.
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Later on, in college, some of the locker rooms, group showers, etc., became occasional hunting grounds. I had no problem in approaching a dude who I thought was checking me out a bit longer than it was usual. A bit of small talk while no one was watching, and most of such encounters ended in my bedroom.
Nope, we did not have Grindr. So, we used the resources at hand. Not much time was wasted. No (fake) pictures were exchanged, and no lengthy schedule syncs ever took place.
The place was my nearby apartment. The time was now. I had just showered. The dude had just showered. So, we were good to go.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jonn3
I hate to think that my gym teacher was right - but he was. You just got used to it.
Did showering together turn the boys in my gym class gay? Unfortunately not to my knowledge. Was it frustrating that they guy in the locker next to you had a bigger cock? Sure was. Is it frustrating that my neighbor has a bigger house? Sure is.
And life goes on.....
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Sure. You got used to it. As you got used to many other things in life. Most importantly, long before we reached the college age, hardly any guy in my class had any issue with nudity, his body image, etc., at all. The growing pains were simply behind us.
For many guys, 'the no big deal about nudity', coupled with spending our summers at the neighboring nude beach translated into a very positive sex attitude.
Sure, some dudes were pretty open minded, and very willing to experiment. The others? Well, not so. But the 'scandalous', gossipy element was out of it. We had all learnt NOT to spread the stories and the news from the lockers, so most dudes kept their knowledge of things to themselves, too.
KD