-- Last week-end my American friend and I went to PATTAYA.
- At his suggestion we stayed-in the flg. & g*y-friendly hotel -

MIKE HOTEL.,
339, MIKE PLAZA BLDG.,
Nongprue, PATTAYA CITY, 20260.;
- tel.: (038)-422 222-29.;
- web: http://www.mikethailand.com
- e-mail: mikehotel-ptty1@hotmail.com
- loc'n.: above MIKE'S SHOPPING PLAZA, (the whole place rather run-down looking that has seen better days..), wch. stretches between Pattaya Beach rd. and Pattaya 2nd. rd. - roughly mid-way between S. Pattaya rd. & Pattayaland 3. going towards C. PATTAYA.
- Main ent'ce. is on 2nd. rd.;
- NB.: Recept'n. is UP on the 2fl., (US.),; as there is no elevator at street level a porter will carry-up one's bags if requested.

- We chose std. rooms on 5fl. at 800.oo. nett per diem;
- Rooms are std. *** with the usual F&F., but no IN-room coffee/tea-making facilities, and apart from a couple of M*rs B*rs no small snacky foods; although drinks,(alc. & non-alc.), are available; rooms are clean, comfortable and adequate enough;
- Note that C*nd*ms are not provided in the bedrooms; but there is a small pharmacy by the 2nd. rd. ent'ce.;
- There is a small & outdoors' swimming pool for wch. add'n. towels are provided;
- There is a 24/7. cafe/rest., but we did not eat-in;
- There is also a 24hr. laundry svce.
- During our stay the staff appeared to be pleasant and obliging.

-- E&OE.. -- Usual disclaimer. -- Bibi. --

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-- On sun., (31st.), evening I went to -

SMART RELAXATION.,
- addr.: Beside 'Older Mike Dept.',
2nd. rd.,
S.PATTAYA, Chonburi;
- tel.: (038)-710 865.;
- web: none.
- loc'n.: roughly 40yds. towards CENT'L. PATTAYA from i'sect. Tnn. S. Pattaya & Pattaya 2nd. rd.; say some 35yds. and on same side as before MIKE'S DEP'T..

- ETA.: approx. 20.30.hrs.;
- It offered a 'Promo.' of 90 mins'. oil massage for 500.Bh. PLUS free 30 mins'. head msg., wch. I accepted.
- Being my first time there I decided to allow its system to take charge, thus I was allocated to Khun Pat, (?),; 30YO. from nr. BKK.; 9 or so yrs. experience as masseur of wch. four are with SMART; speaks for enough English, but not a gt. conversationalist - but then I do pay for the masg. and not for the chat!

-- Massage room measured approx. 6x8ft.; an hole in the wall with the next door room to enable both rooms to share the same air-cond.! Mattress on the floor, covered with cloth; small pillows for one's head.
-
- Khun Pat stayed dressed - white tee-shirt over masseur's trousers - throughout; when I turned-over I enquired if he wasn't too hot? But having turned-DOWN the t'stat. to COLD he wasn't rising to my suggestion.
- I was not offered a pre-msg. shower; but my feet were wiped with a damp cloth before starting the msg..
- A good, thorough & firm massage with plenty of att'n. paid to my *rs*; parts not being massaged were covered with a large & coarse type of towel.
- No hanky-panky, nor any hint, at all.
- Msg. lasted just under the 90 mins. and the head-msg. was approx. 20 mins. duration.

-- A concluding shower. I wasn't too reassured to see exposed electrical conns. on the wall, although I wouldn't expect water to be splashed-UP that HIGH.

-- Back in Recept'n. a cup of hot & herbal tea and, after a polite wish for my return, that was that.

-- Usual disclaimer. -- Bibi. --

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-- As it was my friend who suggested MIKE'S HTL. I thought that it would be impolite to gainsay him; especially as he has stayed there before, is known to Recept'n. and 'It floated his boat.', as it were.
- I did see several mid-eastern and asiatic-looking men there, but none of them apealed to me - quite the opposite, in fact.

-- For me it is within comfortable walking distance of BOYZ' TOWN & of SUNNEE PLAZA; SANSUK SAUNA isn't too far away, either, is it? Also it's only a few steps to the tpt. to JOMTIEN BEACH.

-- Bibi. --

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-- During my long w/e. in PATTAYA I went to JOMTIEN BEACH thrice: fri., (29th.), sat. & sun..
- ETA.: 10.hrs.;
- I went to the section with basically red-colored mat'l. for the deck-chairs just before the hawng nahm, and managed by Khun Om, certainly no prize-winner in the eye-candy stakes, and who delights in wearing the absolute MINIMUM that common decency allows and lets him display his body and to wiggle his sweet & little *rs* to the MAXIMUM - a sight for these sore & olde eyes indeed!
- Not v. many customers in the forenoons; people started to arrive from approx.14.hrs. onwards. On sat. mid-a'noon. there were possibly some 30 customers occupying the 100 or so deck-chairs in Khun Om's area; giving Khum Om plenty of time to socialise and to make himself agreeable.
- Plenty of masseurs and other vendors plying their trades.
- Khun Bia - 40YO.; speaks quite good English - massaged my feet, and a little bit more, daily; on the sun. a'noon. and after promising to give me a 'Special.' massage - the weather looking threatening - he came-back to my room with me. The massage was but so-so and little more than an excuse for him to pleasure himself. Later-on, and after he'd left, I saw that he'd taken with him the small bottle of Scotch! 'Caveat emptor.'.
- I was joined, too, by Khun Toei - 28YO.; short build and dark skinned; fair enough English - who works as a masseur in JOMTIEN PLAZA from the late a'noons. onwards. He has no inhibitions about shewing-off his assets, (u'cut., of avg. length and mouth-fillingly thick: a smoker's delight!), discreetly, of course; I'll allow the hand of discretion to draw the veil of modesty ... .

-- I was there on the sun. a'noon. when some distance away - and as I read later, (The Baht Stop -- Thailand forum.), - a lethal fight broke-out between a couple of DVD. sellers wch. resulted in both of them being taken to hospital.

-- Bibi. --

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-- While I was amusing myself elsewhere my friend went to BLUE HOUSE MASSAGE for a relaxing & oil-massage.
- His comments were not too complimentary: run-down with a gen'l. air of decay and of lack of maint'ce., (I gather that that could be applied to much of PATTAYA, or am I being unfair?), fading & peeling wall-paper and such like.
- His masseur is named Khun Lek - small is the name, small is the body and ditto the endowment, wch. - unusually - is c'cised..
- The massage was passable, as were the apres massage delights.
- Possibly not worth any follow-up visits under the 'Three strikes.' rules?

-- Bibi. --

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-- How is this H1N1 'flu. affecting the various bars and other places of e'tainment.?
- Are these places taking it in their stride, or is the sit'n. seen as 'All hands to the pumps.' or even worse?
-- Bibi. --

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It certainly seems to have killed off Nalong, many of whose posts have been deleted. He's a Pattaya inhabitant, isn't he?

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