[Mojavebottom]

Power and Control

My day started early as usual, 4:30 am with my first task to make the coffee, feed my beautiful little rescue golden retriever and take him our for his business and then settle in to catching up on e-mails and looking at the markets and the new posts on a couple of gay and bi web sites. Just as the lap top was firing up my cell phone gave me the familiar double buzz indicating an incoming text. It was from my friend Don, a guy I have seen for over three years now and it simply inquired “You home?” That loaded two word message brought to mind my relationship with a couple of very nice, masculine straight men that I have seen for years and how our understandings have worked out and worked our for our mutual benefit. Don is a couple of years older than me, a South Boston kid who literally boxed his way out of Southie, in to the service and then in to a great situation as an industrial plumber. He maintains to body of a toned fighter and the self confidence of a guy who can handle himself but also the gentleness of someone who does not need to be reminded of that fact. Married for 47 years to the same woman, a good Catholic of very conservative Italian roots, he is as solid as they come. Up until his wife developed serious health issues they enjoyed a robust and monogamous sex life. When that ended due to her health he sought other means of taking care of his needs. Like a lot of straight men his curiosity brought him to some web sites and to a local cruising spot. I met him there one afternoon after a two week e-mail exchange. That meeting more than three years ago has grown in to a friendship and an understanding that we take care of each other’s needs in private, have become good friends in public and share some hobbies and interests and I take care of his sexual needs without any compromise to his current life. I have taken that deal a number of times since I became single 11 years ago and will take it every time lacking the chance to take another live in man.

That deal is simply reality for many faggots who don’t live in a gay Mecca and who are looking for manly company. So my liaisons begin with a curt text or e-mail, door bell ring, quick hello and off to the bedroom and me to my knees. A lot of my gay friends are appalled that I willingly allow myself to be “exploited” by straight men but I find it to be a very workable solution for all concerned. No complications, no compromises, each knows his role and keeps his place, no strings but mutual respect and very often a friendship bordering on a bromance. In the case of Don’s text that is exactly how it rolls. He showed up at my front door at a bit after 6 am, came in, we chatted a bit about my new dog (always love a man who loves animals) and then it was back to the bedroom and down to business. I love giving head to this man. He is in incredible shape, rock hard, big shooter and absolutely revels in the attention I pay to every nerve ending in his private parts. When he cums I take it and keep sucking and keep him right on the edge of levitating out of the leather chair he uses as his throne. He will keep his hands on my head as I do my work for him and will do so until he simply cannot stand it any more and with a slight pressure will signal me “enough.”

Our dates end with a coffee, chat, maybe the exchange of a book or tool or fishing lures and unstated mutual appreciation for the services rendered and appreciation for the closeness. He knows I am there to suck his seed as well as be a sounding board for those things that wear on guys. We are well beyond any feelings of guilt and as far as the world is concerned we are just two guys who share a lot of the same hobbies and interests. The friendship began with a specific need, grew as I satisfied that need in him and he satisfied that need in me (his seed) and has grown well beyond that original need without compromising his relationship or privacy. It is a perfect situation. He has shared all of his kinks with me and on the rare occasions his wife is out of town at night I have cross dressed for him and we have had more time where he has fucked me. We have played out a few other things that have been lurking in the deep recesses of his sexual imagination and he appreciates my playing along and not being freaked out if he comes in with something new. That close connection could develop in to a power and control situation in many circumstances, especially in a straight or swinger relationship but because it is based upon mutual need and mutual respect those components stay out of the game. That, I believe is why this has lasted and has grown to benefit each equally but in a different way. He has felt free to ask me about various kinks and play them out without fear of rejection or judgment. One such issue came up this summer after he had read a bunch of articles and profiles on Fet Life about water sports. He is freaked out by scat and the idea of free pee was a turn off but he read something about drinking from the tap and its relationship to power exchange and dominance. He came to the house one morning after we had chatted about this for a week or so and I knew he was interested in trying it. We settled in to our positions in the bedroom and I gave him a more extended blowjob, holding him on the edge a few times before I brought him to a very deep and extended orgasm. He shot a few ropes of cum down my throat and I continued my work on his full shaft and then focused on his glans until he signaled me “enough” with some slight pressure on my head held firmly between his strong hands. I released his cock from my lips, looked up at him and told him “let it go.” After I took his cock back in to my mouth it became apparent that he was hesitant so once again I looked up at him and instructed him to let it go and then took his cock deep. He released a little squirt and in response I applied vacuum and suction and encouraged him to relax and let gravity and vacuum do its work. He did and drained his bladder in to my willing mouth. Once drained he laid back exhausted and said “Holy shit.” To that I responded “So now maybe you take me seriously when I tell you to tell me what is on your mind and let me work it out for you.” He nodded and after a few more minutes we got up, cleaned up and went about starting our days. After that and a few other kink experiments our trust has grown by leaps and bounds.

Most of the men I see are not sexually adventurous and would flip out at the thought of anything beyond a quick blowjob with me on my knees and them standing or sitting over me in a dominant position and my hands strictly limited to their cocks and balls. Work the knob, swallow and then they are off to the races until the pressure builds again and they need quick and uncomplicated relief. It works for them and works for me. Once you come to an understanding with a man keep within the lines and give him what he needs and he will give you what you need. Simple concept but hard for a lot of queers to accept. If you step outside of a straight man’s comfort zone you can scare him off for good. My friend Ron of my Brick Hard article is one such guy. I met him late one afternoon cruising at a truck stop, blew him and gave him my number. He has come to my house on a few occasions but is more comfortable on neutral territory. That usually means on one of his many job sites after work and after the other guys have gone home for the night. He will hang out and work on his equipment until I show up to work on his equipment. This usually means giving him head on the seat of his truck or inside a building or house under construction. We get right to work and although I try to extend these sessions and give him the best and longest lasting session I can he is usually so worked up that he needs to shoot hard and urgently so I respect that and give him what he wants. Although he is always short on time and patience he does call me regularly to indulge my drive to suck manly semen. It works out for both of us. The only variation on this theme happened last year. Ron knows that I show up in warm weather in nylon basketball shorts and a tank top and under those shorts he discovered that I always wear satin panties. He discovered that after I blew him in a house under construction. After he came in my mouth and I stood up he looked at me and said “drop ‘em” referring to my shorts. I did so and revealed my hard on nested in a pair of purple satin granny panties. He touched my ass and then brushed my cock with his hand and then told me to jack myself off and cum in to the panties. I did as instructed and shot my load in to the fabric. He watched and was transfixed on the sight of my hard cock in panties being stroked and then the wet semen spot appearing. When finished I stood before him with a growing wet spot and he smiled. He simply said “I like it” and started for the truck leaving me standing there with my shorts around my ankles wearing wet panties. That little exhibition for him earned me three more link ups that week and hot semen like he has never given before. Since then it has become part of our drill when time permits. Whatever it takes. Ron has told me repeatedly that I am his only sexual outlet other than jacking off to porn on the computer and I told him that I would really prefer he save himself for me. We work it out and work to take care of each other’s needs.

If you face reality as an older fag you know you are going to have to work at it to find guys and they will probably not be GQ models and professional athletes. The guys I see are all decent guys, the kind of guys you can trust and guys who are willing to give a friendship a chance just as only as there is no chance that their manhood or relationships can ever be put at risk. They are all either married or divorced, identify as straight and will probably never go domestic but will become friends and activity partners as long as you park the rainbow flag. Respect those boundaries and give men what they need and they will keep you busy.

[jonn3]

I like that - when you both know what you are there for and you are both using each other.

Neither of you are getting exploited - you both have a need and you can scratch each others itch.

[MysticDick1018]

Exactly! If both you you enjoyed it, then exploiting it is not.

[Mojavebottom]

Correct. I have been serving older masculine men since an early age. All have taken good care of me as I have taken good care of them. It is the natural order of things. The only creeps I have encountered are those who grow up in extremely repressive or extremely permissive environments. Those who grow up learning respect and responsibility from an early age are never a danger and appreciate those who live in a like manner.