At that age logic goes out the window - guys are often just looking for a "justification" for their actions other that saying "I like sex with guys" - that would mean they were (oh my god) gay!

I had one buddy that I think every time we ever fooled around he would preface it with "Damn I am so horny! I wish there were some girls around...." I knew that within 10 minutes I would be getting my dick sucked - but it was not gay because he would have rather had a girl....






It is a strange leap of logic - but I have seen comments from more than one guy who has said his wife is not into sex anymore and does not care if he fools around as long as it is physical not emotional - so she is ok with him getting off with a guy because he will not fall in love - just sex.

Quote |

I have also come across married bisexual and even heterosexualcouples who agreed that their marriage was of open, polygamous kind.

There is seemingly every reason for a partner who does not want to have sex any more to let his other half experience it with someone else.

Yet, I see such cases as somewhat exceptional vs. a number of grown up, married, supposedly monogamous men who believe that having sex with other men does not constitute cheating... It's the boys' thing sorta thing...

I am not complaining at all. Simply find the leap of logic so huge that hardly any logic applies...

KD

Quote |

It is just the logic (justification) we are used to. Back in our teens we convinced ourselves doing it with other guys is not gay if we are doing it because there were not girls around...

But that is how the male mind works - we can always justify getting off!

Quote |

After sucking off a nice bearded daddy in the winter of 2019 in an ABS, after I got him off he started talking, almost crying, a confession when he thanked me: he was just so damn horny and too young to end his sex life, but his wife had cancer and was in such pain and bad health it was impossible for her, and he didn't want to cheat on her with another woman but another guy was more justifiable to him. I just let him talk for a few minutes, sincerely apologized for the situation he was in, and told him he was ok, "it" was ok, and I wished him and his wife the best in their battle and hoped that they would win. Caught me off-guard, an instant confession like that. In his case it was just a matter of I need sex and human contact, and an ABS can provide that with little expectation and chance of someone wanting to form any kind of friendship, relationship, meet-up, whatever again down the road. Just sex and human contact for the moment to get me through the crisis, for today.

On a different note, one guy explained the "I like dick but I'm not gay" thing. They liked sucking cock and hooking up with another guy and everything that m2m sex entails, but they could never form feelings toward another man at all. This was a couple decades ago before the word bromance existed, which is basically just that, sex with no emotional feelings towards the other.

Quote |

It is interesting the guys who feel it is not cheating - or less cheating - if they have sex with another man rather than a woman. You see posts "My wife no longer wants to have sex and I am not ready to give up on sex but I love her" and so they find an outlet that they think is not cheating - just sex.



I often wonder about guys like that - if they were growing up today when being gay does not have the same negative stigma it had when they were kids - if their feelings would be different? I remember as kids the worst thing you could call another boy was "fag" - if asked I could not tell you anyone I knew growing up that was gay - sure there were guys I fooled around with - but none of us were gay - that was wrong. And a lot of guys still seem to have the same mindset - "I could never have feelings for a guy - I just like the sex".

But now Middle Schools often have "gay / straight alliance" clubs and things to help kids deal with their feelings - something unheard of when I was young. You see YouTube videos of young kids coming out. The view of society has changed a lot in one generation.

Quote |

I know, right? Two generations ago when I was in high school, the students were fighting for a student smoking lounge, and it was being considered by the administrators! These days, good luck getting a teacher's smoking lounge re-instituted!

Quote |

Our school did have an outdoor area for student smoking - even though the age to buy cigarettes was 18!

Funny now being a smoker would be more of a stigma against you than being gay in most schools.

Quote |

As it should be. I have my reasons.
1) Everyone should be able to come out of the closet without be made fun of or shunned. Besides, that's more potential fun for us!
2) Not bashing smokers. I just know smoking really fucked up my mom's lungs before she died. Cigarettes can really do some damage.

Quote |