Why, yes... You are, in fact, a freak.

You already knew that, though.

While it is impossible to take this seriously, and while I suspect this is probably just a joke, I will be obnoxious and offer you some practical advice to take into consideration the next time you feel like taking a dump in the woods:

"Leaves of three, let it be."

And also, do remember the cardinal rule when hiking in an ecologically preserved area: if you pack it in, you must pack it out. Good luck with that.

I hope this helps.

Geez, most of us guys just write our names in the snow...