You know what, GuyTopeka? I remember the "good old days" when guys USED to hang out until EVERYONE was happy. Doesn't seem like that is the case anymore.
Well, that's not entirely true... but mostly true.
Guys who come to my home RARELY blow their load and head out the door. It is presumably much more difficult to make an easy exit from my apartment. You know... if we have talked online, made arrangements, swapped photos, discussed details, sent directions, drove through town late at night... all of this effort for online meetings and such usually results in an encounter that isn't over in twenty-five seconds. After a dude goes to greater lengths to meet another dude, usually he wants to have some fun and take his time. It can be awkward for a guy to retreat out the door, leaving his partner unsatisfied.
Also, I suppose it helps that I always tell a guy who is coming to my place that there's a half-hour minimum and he'd better not waste my time or his time with a three minute session. Frankly, I'd rather jerk off.
In an ABS cruising situation, guys can easily avoid eye-contact, zip up, stand up, turn around and be out the door in no time.
ONCE in a GREAT WHILE a guy who cums too fast MIGHT make some sort of half-hearted attempt at finishing me off. Most do not, but a few at least TRY.
The problem with this is, as we all know, men seem to lose almost all sexual skills immediately after they shoot a load. Hey, I know I do, so I understand. It's hard to be INTO it anymore once your balls are empty. This is not the case EVERY time, but mostly it is.
EVERY great cocksucker I've ever met or talked to has always refrained from cumming until he's made ME cum first. He KNOWS he will be more into it if he's still hard and horny himself. And those guys who are into being highly submissive also do not cum first because they feel the dominant guy should have that privilege.
I'm trying to think of a time when a dude might have cum first and then still finished me off successfully. I can't think of any at the moment. Probably there have been a few, but I'm hard-pressed to recall them. Sometimes I'll just stop a dude... you know, he's standing there, maybe half-heartedly touching my dick, all the passion gone from his eyes, unable to suck anymore... Eh. Why bother? Go on, dude... get out of here. I'm not having fun anymore anyway...
This shit happened AGAIN to me last night. Swear to god.
Classic bearish dude was cruising me. I thought he was OK. He LOOKED like he had an intensity about him that made me believe he would be a hot cocksucker. Turns out I was right -- he WAS a hot cocksucker -- but the hotness sure didn't last.
This dude sucked me for about two minutes and did a great job. I was a happy guy, thinking that this was going to be a great encounter. He had a highly skilled mouth. Then he stops for a second, pulls out his dick, starts beating off rapidly. He dives down on me again and just holds his mouth on my dick, shoving it down his throat. Yeah, OK... nice, but... could you MOVE your head a little? Once he started to gag a bit, that was it. He blew his load instantly. He stood up, jerked on my dick with his hand for ten seconds, then turned and left.
Asshole.
At the very LEAST I remember a time when guys used to TELL me they were going to cum. SOMETIMES I could, if stimulated enough, blow a load myself at the same time if armed with this knowledge. But even if I could not, at least they let me know instead of just getting off and leaving me hanging.
I don't know if this is some sort of new rudeness or what. I can't say that it is "selfish" of guys to cum when having sex! After all, isn't that the idea? But I DO often wonder if they do this ALL the time to ALL their partners. If so... then indeed they ARE selfish.
But I'll tell ya... Honestly, sometimes I don't care. I LIKE to get my dick sucked several times in one night and wait to cum until I meet the guy who does the best job. So if these dudes can't or won't get me off or if they just blow a load quickly... whatever. I kind of feel sorry for them. Frankly, there is always someone else who wants a shot at my dick. I have yet to end a night without getting off, so...
Finally, you mentioned a guy who cruises you but waits half an hour before hooking up. I frequently do that as well, and thought I'd share MY reasons for this behavior.
Since I enjoy the ABS scene so much, I don't want to rush it, for one thing. I also want to get into it for a while. I like to jerk off alone in the booths and watch some porn. I LOVE to get my dick hard many, many, many times -- then shove it back into my pants and let it simmer down again. It builds up the tension and the desire. I often like to give guys a show if they want it through the Buddy Window. I try NOT to be a cocktease, but... I guess sometimes I am by default. I may not always want to meet up with the guys I am showing off my dick to, but I like to let them watch me and do my best to signal to them that this is ALL I want to do at the moment.
And to be honest... I like to check out everyone before making a decision about who I might want to meet. Sometimes there are two or three guys I already know. I may want one of them again. Or I may want someone new. I like to get the vibe of the whole place before I make a move or invite someone to join me. And naturally, it takes a bit of time before being able to see everyone who is in there. When I arrive, some guys are already in booths behind closed doors. I like to wait and see who emerges.
One last reason why I often wait before hooking up with someone, even if I know him from a previous encounter... I almost always hang back until I have a window of privacy. I am rather territorial, too. I like to find my own booth and invite a guy to join ME rather than go into HIS booth. If other dudes are standing around and watching every move I make, I make NO moves at all. I will let a guy I am interested in see me go into a booth, of course, but I don't want others to take note of where I am or who I am with. I won't give the "giggle queens" and gossipers something to discuss later on. Also, it sounds kind of silly but I think being mysterious lends some general appeal.
Not letting many other guys see me go into booths also helps avoid unwanted cruisers. You know... when that OLD, OLD dude keeps stalking you and winds up knocking on your door or on the other side of the Buddy Window EVERY fucking time you go into a booth -- that gets annoying in a hurry. Troll behavior is better thwarted by ignoring the guy and keeping my location as much of a "secret" as possible. I HATE it when a guy who is into me is stopped from meeting me because some troll races to the booth. Or equally as awful... when a troll stakes out the OTHER side of a booth so no one else wants to walk by him to get in. He'll stand there in front of the door, NOT go inside himself, and keep everyone else at bay.
The dude I mentioned in the "Kissing" post... he cruised me for forty minutes before I had a period of privacy. I was worried he'd think I wasn't interested in him anymore because I didn't hook up with him right away. That wasn't the case. I just didn't want to let half a dozen other guys see WHO I wanted. And though I can't do anything about men standing around and listening outside the booth or seeing me and a buddy emerge, I prefer to have them NOT know who is in there beforehand. Twice this guy made a move to go into a booth and have me follow him, leaving the door open for me to come in. And both times within seconds someone ELSE came running up to his open door, not giving me a moment to even take a single step. The dude obviously shooed them away and waited until I was free. Later, when we WERE together, I told him to be patient and that I like privacy, for his future reference. I didn't want him to think I wasn't interested anymore. He seemed OK with this.
In reality, I'd get together with him EVERY time I see him, no matter who else is there. So it isn't a matter of wasting time or getting acclimated or jerking off repeatedly to get hornier -- it's just a matter of some degree of privacy.
Asking for privacy in an ABS is a little off the wall. I'm not seeking TOTAL privacy, of course -- this is not possible and should never be expected. I guess I just look to be as unassuming as possible. I truly think some dudes find this appealing. I don't flaunt myself. I mind my own business and do my own thing.
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