Well, MY "good old days" were in New York. I honestly have no idea if this has anything to do with it or not. But "way back when" I sure remember EVERYONE getting off. At least MOST of the time.

But sure... there were plenty of times during my youth that one guy would blow and then go. It happens. That never really bothered me. Like you said, when a guy cums, he's outta there most of the time. Par for the course. And, being a man myself, I understand this. WOMEN sure have a hard time dealing with it, but I think gay men are more accepting and don't take it personally.

To answer your questions:

The guys who blow me for hours always get off. But admittedly, they do this themselves most of the time. This is simply how it is; it's the arrangement and it's what they WANT. MOST have told me they do NOT want me to do anything to them. A FEW have demanded that I don't touch their dick. If that is what they want, fine with me.

But in situations where this is NOT the case and things are mutual, then we BOTH get each other off. If one of us cums first, the other helps the next guy. Generally speaking, usually we both cum within a short time, as you described. I think what YOU say you do -- stick around a few minutes and see what transpires, is about right.

Also, most, but not all, guys who blow me are very submissive and will NOT cum unless I tell them it's OK to cum. This is, once again, what they WANT and have ASKED for me to do. I do not tell a guy he can't cum without permission unless he wants this kind of scene.

Truth be told, I'm NEVER going to turn down a three hour BJ from a guy who is into that. But what I like best is mutual, passionate and romantic sex with a guy who shares an attraction with me.

Too bad this is hard to find!

I do agree with you, mostly: we are each responsible for our own orgasm. Mostly!

We can each just jerk off and get off that way and be responsible for our own orgasm, but the whole point of sex is to be with a partner to help you do that or do it FOR you. As such, your partner is partly responsible for helping you get off in the way you enjoy most (or close to it, anyway).

Clearly, most of the cocksuckers I meet GET OFF by sucking my dick (and probably ANY dick, for that matter). So this makes them hot and happy. I get off best by HAVING my dick sucked. As I've said before: everyone is happy with the arrangement.

I'm sure I've told stories wherein I do NOT cum each and every time. And frankly, I KNOW I've mentioned that cumming isn't usually my main goal. Sounds silly, in a way -- but for me, I love the sex more than cumming. I hate ending it.

I think WOMEN are more responsible for their own orgasm than men are -- that statement is most often applied to non-orgasmic or frigid females. MOST men can pretty much cum with no problem at all!

But still, you make a valid point.

And if that's the case, it seems to me that men with PE are responsible for their own orgasm to a degree, too.

But in THEIR case, the orgasm they are having happens in seconds. This is sexually unsatisfying and distressing to their partner. Women married to men with PE have serious sexual issues to deal with. They are NEVER satisfied.

And since PE is almost always a mental issue, don't these men have some responsibility to look into the reasons WHY they have this problem and work toward fixing it?

I tend to believe they DO. I do realize that time and money can make this problematic, however. Not a lot of guys with PE will talk to a doctor about it. Nor will they bother with therapy. Nor will they discuss techniques for improvement WITH their partner. Sometimes a good partner can be a LOT of help when dealing with PE. This partner can be a REAL partner or just a trick, if you have the balls to discuss it first.

So when I meet a dude who cums in two seconds, I don't get deeply or truly mad and I do NOT feel "hostile" at all. I think that's a bad choice of word, no offense. I just move on and accept it, knowing I will surely meet a dude who is into getting me off and can do the job. So far... no problems with that at all.

But I DO get annoyed and irritated, and I think I have a right to feel that way.

I ESPECIALLY get peeved in cases where a dude cruises me for an hour and then the hookup lasts less than a minute.

This is COCKTEASE behavior, even though it may be involuntary on the guy's part. Yet he KNOWS he's going to blow in a short time. He just cruises anyway -- and he has a right to cruise, of course. It just sucks for the guy on the OTHER end of his desires who gets his cock teased for twenty seconds and gets NOTHING out of it at all.

I don't like being that guy.

I don't mind not cumming. Don't mind that at all. In fact, sometimes I like it. I can get THREE or FOUR blowjobs in one night. Works for me!

But it's a waste of my time having a dude cruise me hard and then not deliver ANYTHING at all.

I don't know, man... it takes me a few minutes to even start getting into it. I mean... five or six strokes does NOTHING for me. My dick doesn't even get fully hard in that short a time.

If we're all responsible for our own sexual performance, and I believe we MOSTLY are, then men with PE are responsible to DO something about it. At the very least, get the balls to see your doc and try out some antidepressants, which can be very helpful for this condition, even when it is NOT physical.

For the record, too -- you guys know I enjoy coming here to BITCH about little shit that bugs me. It's the fun of these boards. Do rest assured, however, that my dramatic writing doesn't necessarily indicate that I am seriously pissed off at someone for whatever reason. YES, I get bugged by guys who blow in ten seconds. It's BORING sex that isn't worth it. It's a waste of ten seconds and worse -- a waste of a fun cruise that turns out to be worthless in the end. I like the cruising ALMOST as much as I like the sex, but the BEST cruising ends with GOOD sex.

I'm proud that I can last for four hours if I have a guy who is into that. But I'm also proud that I can cum at will just about anytime I want to -- given at least a few minutes to get into it, of course. I have had HOT encounters that lasted ten minutes and will be remembered for the rest of my life. I've also had SHITTY encounters that lasted two hours that I won't soon forget, either.

I will admit, however, that sometimes I hold off TOO long, not wanting to end great sex. I will also admit that SOMETIMES, though rarely, I can tell if this bugs a guy. MOST all guys will ASK me to cum for them -- and I do. Then everyone is happy. The few guys who say nothing -- should say something if I am frustrating them!

But I can't say much to a guy who shoots in four seconds. It's over and done JUST that fast. What's to say?

I met a guy who told me not to touch his dick (at my home) because he cums too quick. I told him I'd work on that with him. So I teased his cock just a little and told him to just step away if he got too close and that I wouldn't mind if he shot accidentally or if he couldn't handle too much. He felt at ease and did just this, stepping back when he had to. We were able to play around a LONG time in this fashion. He was MOST pleased with how it turned out. I never made him feel bad about it; we just had fun.

Generally speaking -- cum and go is the rule of thumb when cruising. But like GWT, I think a little bit of extra effort for a few minutes is simply polite. Most guys "get it." If they can't cum soon or don't want to, they usually let the other guy know it's OK to leave.

This is something I do all the time. If a guy was sucking me and I didn't get off before he did, usually he'll stand up and try to jerk me off. RARELY can anyone make me cum using his hand. So I'll let him do this for a bit, enjoying it, but knowing I'm not going to cum. I'll just move his hand away or tell him thanks for the good time or whatever, giving him "permission" to walk away without pressuring him to get me off.

I think that's OK.

Hope that answers your questions.

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