Shorter is better. Get to the damn point already.
First person voice, "I", is better. Genuinely true stories are better.
If you use a third-person or "God's eye" viewpoint, there damn well better be only 2 characters or it's hard to follow and not worth it.
Never give last names - they're just irritating clutter.
NEVER, ever use the words "swirl", "smear" or "glans". They're stupid, over-used cliches only revealing how pathetic the writer is.
If I have to read one more LAME description of a blow job where the writer "swirled my tongue around his cockhead", I will throw up and that is no joke.
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