Another peeve:
"With one push, he entered me. The pain was so intense, I screamed. But he covered me with his kiss [or: hand]. It began to feel pleasurable..."
LAME!!! BEEN DONE ALREADY!!! NOT EXCITING OR BELIEVABLE TO BEGIN WITH!!!
Not that I've seen it in your writing, TAT; only saying it in general, to anyone who may write.
Believe me - if the guy pushes in so fast/hard that you must literally cry out pain, it does NOT get better from there (or turn to pleasure) and is NOT AT ALL sexy.
|