Hey SC
Much of the tactics applied depends upon the urban environment you live in.
I have been blessed with 'my choice' of cities to live in. Both Vienna, Austria and SF, CA have reasonably good systems of public transportation and both cities are compact and thus, easy to get around in.
Yet, I would neither disclose my precise address nor would I go to any address given to me by someone I have just 'met online'. I hate to sound paranoid here, but I would not feel very comfortable with such a setup (pun intended). Ever so often, bad things do happen, and I would rather not be involved.
I am totally punctual but have no problem with waiting for 15 min. for a guy and would give him 15 more, if he phones in or texts, saying he is on his way. But that's it. This is where I draw my line. I grew up in a society which only allowed ladies to be reasonably late. Men were always supposed to be on time. Like I say, 'I am not really into ladies...'
Living in easy-to-reach areas has its advatages. So, we'll arrange for a quick meet up in one of the neighboring coffee shops, check up the vibe and pick it up from there. If it is a 'GO', a 5 minute walk would bring us to my place.
I have dispensed with long drives to anywhere. Most guys simply do not show up anyway and I do not feel like wasting my time and energy on them. I can always host, so most guys, keeping that in mind, agree to come to the 'downtown location'.
I would always meet in public. If the dude lied about his age, looks, sent a faked pic, etc., I would be polite and direct at the same time. 'Hi, thanks for coming. I was interested in that guy on a picture you sent and am not really into you. Sorry.' And I would move on. No one has ever protested or said anything, simply because they knew, they were lying and they were caught.
Now, no one really understands what's going on through our heads (pun intended) while 'we are rompin' in the hay'. There were times, when I simply had to say, 'Nope, no more of this.' (Usually, to guys who have too many teeth and do not know when to use them and when not to. And to guys who were profoundly dishonest and are now hoping to 'persuade me' to go into a little frottage, mutul masturbation or whatever else with them.)
I am pretty explicit and honest about my intentions. Not because I believe in those virtues alone but mostly because I believe in the economics of it. So, if a dude is here to waste my time and energy, he is out.
Finally, a certain number of men would get into it for few minutes just to chicken out, once the 'uncomfortable line' sets in. Apparently, this gives them some sense of power and/or control or something. Few guys are virtually conscious-stricken, too and are swaying between having their cake and not eating it. I guess, once you agree to meet up with the 'new guys', this kind of scenario cannot be quite eliminated ahead of time no matter how hard you try.
KD
