Okay, but now the difficult part of the discussion. You've experienced the joys of man to man sex and want to continue. You mentioned that you are a married man, and your wife does not know about this. From those comments, I assume you feel she would not approve. While I am all for guys having fun, I question your commitment to the vows of your marriage. I had the same problem at one point. Thankfully, my wife was very open-minded and as we already had an open style marriage did not disapprove with the stipulation of proper precautions. Perhaps the "embarrassment" you previously felt was related to misgivings about your marriage vows. You need to do some deep soul searching.
Do you feel gay encounters are a violation of your marriage vows? Some people do, and others just consider it as a convenient outlet for NSA sex.
How will you handle the situation if your "gay" side gets exposed? Unfortunately, not everyone you run into in the ABS will be a stranger. You might unknowingly actually suck off or get sucked off by a friend. There is also the chance that some slighted queen might get revenge by outing you. In my case, I don't advertise my sexual orientation, but neither do I deny it.
And lastly, since you are in a committed relationship; you owe it to your partner to stay informed on HIV and AIDS, to use proper precautions when engaging in any risky sexual activities, and get a periodic HIV test.
I'm not trying to discourage you. I am just being bluntly honest. I think outmoded sexual repression should be discarded by society. There are definite differences between sex and love. WE can have both in our life and not necessarily with the same person.
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