If there is a gay heaven on earth then it is surely Thailand. You will love it. In my early trips to Thailand, I stayed at Babylon in Bangkok which served me well for introductions. Also in Bangkok: Telephone Bar, DJ Station and the 'Soi Twilight' go-go bars are a must at least once. Checkout the various posts in this forum for hints on what is happening and where. Two or three days in Pattaya will be worthwhile, and if you can afford it go to Chiang Mai for a cultural infusion. For beaches, Koh Samui maybe, but not the hoi polloi tourist sleaze pit of Phuket. But the best recommendation I can make is to be very polite and smile a lot. You will be surprised at the many connections you can make with the locals simply by being friendly.
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