Wikipedia says that Ashley Madison had stunning 39 Mio clients worldwide. No doubt, a few, even quite a few men (out of the mind-boggling 39 Mio.) may have tried their best to hide their identities. Judging by the recent press coverage, very, very few actually did. We can talk about the case of universal hubris here.
I imagine that most adults pretty much tend to run their affairs within certain parameters of an established pattern of behavior. Say, I am a gay guy out and about. I do not fly the rainbow flag, and do not go around telling people who I barely know that I am gay. Yet, if I meet a guy I am interested in, I'd give him my private cell, and not the one I use for business. Actually, there is little or no reason for this. But, this would be an automatic reaction probably originating in the times when we used to have P.O.B. addresses in order to make sure that no one gets our possibly compromising mail, porn mags, VHS cassettes with gay porn on it, etc.
There has always been a sort of an unspoken and unwritten but very much respected non-aggression pact between the press corps on one side, and the prominent members of the Hollywood elite and political establishment on the other side. All parties understood only too soon and too well that they have been living pretty well off each other's endeavors. So, everyone drew a certain line which no one really wanted to cross. Doing so would have been both counterproductive and damaging to the common, system maintenance related cause.
This chummy relationship was really made possible by the fact that the media used to be controlled by a limited number of people who all largely agreed to play by a certain rulebook.
The universal access to the web, and the uncontrollable flow of information have changed all of this. The age of no secrets, as you have rightly named it here, seems to be doing well, and is showing no signs of going anywhere any time soon.
KD
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