Now, I want to college in a major European city. Sure, scoring up with a chick was not as easy, simple and inexpensive as having your buddy give you a BJ. Scoring with a girl meant, dating, romance, time, money. Lots of time and lots of money with no guarantee that a few weeks into the process you may get some. But dating girls was far from impossible. And quite a few guys took that road, too. Some of them looked for their buddies for some little sexual support on the way, and the others stayed faithful to their heterosexual/heteronormative ideals.

I fully concur with John here that most probably, a very large number of guys must have had some sort of m2m sexual experience along the way, while at college. Now, such sexual encounters took place under the condition of total secrecy. No one was going to tell. Hence, I am not surprised that the guys are not mentioning it too often.

I can also imagine that for a number of guys, once or twice off an encounter with another dude that led to nothing in particular, whereas probably interesting, and maybe even satisfying in its time and day stayed what it really was, a once or twice off thing not worth elaborating too much on.





This was probably not just the upbringing but very much so the prevailing societal attitudes of the times. A dude shot his load or two after a hot session. What's there not to like? He may have prefered having some other hardware at play though, but the experience sure beat your usual 'solitary exploration'. At that point, a few guys started thinking that 'one thing usually leads to another'. And a few months later, you are totally hooked up to it, you are enjoying yourself, while the world is about to get ready and reject you totally for being a freak, a homo, a fag, an outcast, whatever. AND you saw your childhood dream of a happy family with kids and the white picket fence just fly out of the window...

Quite a few guys were brought up with an explicit promise of a social contract. You stay with the mainstay, you uphold the majority values, and the majority lifestyle, you shun out the freaks, and the majority will take care of you, and make sure that you'll never have to leave your comfort zone. The golden boys would take care of each other's future. You know, 'Us - The Righteous against them The Freaks'.

The promise was largely maintained in the 40's, 50's 60's and the 70's mostly for strategical reasons. But the '80s brought a landslide change. No one was going to come riding to the rescue of your sorry laid-off, mortgage-ridden, with a bunch of unpaid bills ass just because you were a willing conformist supporting the views of the moral majority.

The social contract deal in its very narrow sense was off. Conformism alone stopped paying bills.

A vast new alternative, and not only marginal world emerged on many fringes of the society, making brave forays into the mainstream.



This is a universal trait of humanity. I had one of my regular buddies tell me that he would have never had sex with me if I had not told him to. Frankly, I am not even sure that I ever formally 'told him' to have sex with me. (How many guys go around formally telling other dudes to have sex with them?) More likely, I pulled out my cock and started stroking it, and he fell down on his knees and started licking/sucking it. When I slapped him on his ass, he bent over for me to ride in.

If he really had asked me if I was telling me to have sex with me, I would have certainly told him to do so

We are all being constantly told that we should be trying to relentlessly promote our own, usually misperceived self-interest first and foremost. Any number of people are buying things that they do not need with the money that they do not have only to go through the interminable agonies of buyer's remorse at the thought that someone else may have clinched an even better a deal over the same item of dubious practical value.

Similar logic applies to some of our past experiences. See, I was nailing this buddy of mine who was just a regular next door college dude. I would have never done so if he had not asked for it, and actually, being the hunk that I was in those days, I could have scored a much hunkier, cooler dude... or at least so goes the narrative. So, actually, none of that pounding, and none of those many shoots had anything to do with me. I only did it because this other guy was willing...

With some dudes, at some point of time, the maturity kicks in, and they see that they should own it, too. They did what they did in their time and day, under the circumstances, and they see that there is no real reason for them to deny it anymore. In particular, now that being gay has become part of the mainstream, too.

KD

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