Quote:
Originally Posted by jonn3
Here in the United States with our Puritan origins it was very different. The origins of our culture are that sex is for having children in marriage - not just for fun. Although that goes totally against the physical reality the ideal is still buried deep in the culture.
Our growing bodies were telling us we wanted - NEEDED to have sex - but even though I grew up after the sexual revolution of the 60's society still said you should wait for marriage.
That is why even masturbation was something to be done in private and not talked about. When you did have a buddy that you jacked off with - or maybe started jacking each other - or moved on to sex you made sure no one ever knew.
Your justification was this is my only option and I am just doing it to get off - kissing and making out was an acknowledgment that you were enjoying the sex not only doing it to get off.
And for us that was a major step.
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I find those cultural contrasts very fascinating.
Yet, even in East Med culture(s) very few guys ever talked about masturbation. Sure, everybody did it. Everybody knew about it. So, this was taken for granted, and no one thought that this was a subject fit for any conversation even among the guys who were sexually intimate with each other.
Our narrative was simply based on the premise that sex was something enjoyable that the adults practiced with each other.
The major step was deciding that you were going to be one of the 'in-crowd' of free, open-minded adults who were enjoying their lives to the fullest. Or you chose to stay out of the game because you were not mature enough for it, had some sort of serious disability, etc.
The main idea was to enjoy sex. No one thought that you were necessarily gay because you were enjoying m2m sex. It was important to be a player, to enjoy what was readily available, and go on with your day.
This also explains the little attention we used to pay to the guys who moved on, and sort of petered away from our close-knit coteries. They did not really stop playing. They found a girlfriend (or a boyfriend), and started a monogamous relationship until it broke, and they started looking for fun elsewhere.
KD