I forget when and where, but we recently discussed the issue of deciding when to kiss a guy if we are unsure if he wants to kiss or not. I think this was in relation to bookstore cruising, but I can't recall for sure.

I've run into this a LOT lately.

I recall mentioning that I seldom meet guys who kiss anymore. Maybe that was true in Florida, but it sure doesn't seem to be the case "up north!" The guys here are into kissing much more so than the Florida dudes I meet. A desire to keep warm, perhaps?



Seriously... there seems to be a lot more affection going on in the bookstores I've been cruising. Which works well for me -- I am very much into affectionate encounters more so than quick tricks (though I enjoy quick tricks, too).

I'm quite sure that a lot of guys have been nervous to make a move to kiss ME. I am often asked if I am straight or married, so I think this has a lot to do with it. I can usually get the signal across to guys with little difficult that I'm cool with kissing (provided, of course, that I am attracted to their FACE). So while many may hesitate, they generally get around to it. Once they do, they don't seem to want to stop. That's fine with me, too -- I enjoy cumming while being kissed. BAD kissers will make me go limp, but that's the subject of another post for another day -- and to my delight, I've only met with ONE bad kisser so far. All the rest have been highly skilled.

The problem comes with the "straight" or "bi" or "curious" guys who frequent the bookstores. There are an awful lot of them, of course. And I have no difficulty figuring out WHY they don't kiss. We've all seen the ads online: "I'll do anything but I'm not into kissing," etc.

So... OK, fine. Whatever makes you happy, dude.

If kissing is a challenge to your masculinity or if you "just like dick" but aren't "into guys," that's your business, not mine.

BUT...

I'm meeting a LOT (and I mean a LOT) of guys who are clearly at a stage of sexual development that is halfway between ACHING for male to male affection and still being fearful of it.

I've met guys like this before -- it's no big deal and nothing all that curious. What is odd to me is that there are so many of them all of a sudden!

Maybe it is that there have ALWAYS been a lot of them but I never hooked up with many. Or never noticed.

But I have to wonder if changing attitudes about homosexuality having something to do with it. If these guys are feeling less "guilty" about what they desire, maybe they are reaching out a bit more in recent times. Does that make sense?

I met a dude a couple weeks ago and ran into him again last Saturday. I think I already briefly mentioned that I am quite sure I gave him his very first man-to-man kiss. He muttered something about "never done this" as I moved to kiss him. But he DID kiss me back -- at least a little. I didn't pressure him or do it for long, sensing he was nervous. He didn't tighten up his mouth or reject me. He made sure there was some saliva exchange going on. And he came shortly after that. When we said our goodbyes, he was grinning broadly and had that after-sex glow about him. So I am sure he enjoyed himself, even if he wasn't quite ready for the kissing.

It pleases me greatly to consider that possibly he will remember me as his first male kiss for the rest of his life. I think that's HOT.

Usually I will not attempt to kiss a guy unless he lets me know he wants me to. This dude, however, kept doing everything affectionate that was possible to do in an ABS booth outside of kissing. He touched my face tenderly, ran his fingers through my hair, rubbed my chest, rubbed my back, hugged me tightly, let me rub my dick all over his ass. Finally, he kept rubbing his face on my face and letting his lips brush over my face, neck, ears, etc. I figured, "fuck it," so I kissed him.

I think he made sure he told me whatever he said which included the words "never done this" so that I would get the hint NOT to get TOO carried away. I got the hint. It was cool.

Last night I met a dude who was into having me give him a show through the Buddy Window. This went on for a LONG time, maybe half an hour. I spent a fortune in tokens jerking off for the guy. I took a break at one point, then returned and gave him MORE of a show.

He never indicated to me that he wanted anything other than this, but I was OK with it.

I was JUST getting ready to cum and I leaned back so I could get my dick nice and close to the window and I wrenched my neck, giving myself a painful Charley-horse about two seconds before I would have shot. That sucked. I wasn't able to cum, distracted by the throbbing in my neck.

I shrugged and gestured to the dude that I wasn't able to cum at that moment, pointed at my neck. I was annoyed with myself. I left the booth and he came around to meet me outside the door.

At the time, he and I were the only two in the place except for two other guys who were standing far away having a quiet conversation. Normally I do NOT chat in bookstores but since no one else was around to be disturbed and the other two guys were also talking, I figured I'd have a conversation with the dude.

He asked if I was straight or married or bi or gay. I told him I was gay. He said he was "a little of both," which I assume means he's bi. So we talked for a while. I told him I had hurt my neck and needed five minutes before I could get it up again and cum, if he wanted to wait.

Finally I told him I wanted to jerk off and invited him to watch. We went into a booth together, pulled out our dicks. I should note that the entire time he'd been watching me previous to this as well as when we were together in a booth, he never got fully hard, though he WAS halfway aroused. But he NEVER took his eyes off my dick, except to stare INTO my eyes from time to time.

So he tentatively puts his hand under my shirt from behind. He's rubbing my back and sliding his hand down to my ass. He touched my hard dick with a single finger every now and then, cups my balls. I put my arm around his neck and rubbed his shoulders, then played with his hair, which was very soft and silky. It was easy to tell he was enjoying all of this. He rubbed my chest next so I did the same, sliding my hand under his shirt collar and reaching down to play with his nipples as we jerked off. He also kept rubbing his face all over my face. I don't know -- I think dudes like the scruffy beard!

Anyway, he kept doing this, rubbing his face on mine. He ALSO kept kissing my face and neck and ears, but wouldn't get close enough to my lips, turning his face constantly so a kiss was never implied. He also kept squeezing his body closer and closer to me. No complaints there. He wanted to be hugged by a man, I could tell. So I did. I kissed his face in return but wasn't confident enough to go after his lips, much as I would have liked to. I got the vibe that it would freak him out.

I'd hate to ruin a good encounter with an unwanted intrusion, you know?

So, being close to him was exciting anyway, for both of us. I shot a HUGE load of cum for the guy. He was nearly begging for it, said: "I'm dying to see your cum, buddy." It was all very hot -- but it could have been even hotter.

I'm not complaining, though. I'll take what I can get and I respect the limits of other guys just as I want them to respect mine.

It's just that I've RARELY encountered so many guys who get within millimeters of a kiss but don't go through with it. I've had men who simply do NOT kiss at all, but these guys also do not seem to want ANY sort of affection.

This kind of affection-seeking dude who is afraid to kiss is something new for me.

Anyone else meet these guys recently? Is this my imagination? Are there more and more guys who secretly crave tenderness with a man but have never tried it? Are they waiting for the OTHER guy to make the first move? If so, WHY do they keep turning their heads to send a message that a kiss is not welcome but anything else is still OK?

If there's one thing sexually I do best it is kissing. I could, in fact, exist for several months without a blowjob if I could kiss men I'm attracted to on a regular basis. These guys are missing out by NOT kissing me!

Sadly, I'M missing out, too.

Comments?

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I remember the kissing thread, seems like I started it. I love to kiss but I don't run into too many other guys that think the same way. Since I got into truckers a few years ago I've been more than a little surprised how many are willing to kiss. Actually it blows my mind. I'll meet a trucker that looks like he out to beat somebody's ass but in reality he just wants to suck some dick and, heaven forbid, kiss.

One other thing we've touched one a few times here but never really dicussed is depravation. Not just kissing but all aspects of sex. But since we're on kissing right now we'll limit it to that. As much as I like to kiss, sometimes it's hotter to be millimeters away from a kiss than to actually kiss. To be nose to nose, maybe even brushing your lips across the other guy's lips, hugging, rolling around, heavy breathing, that can be pretty damn hot. Trying to entice him into a kiss knowing all along he never will. For someone like me it takes A LOT of will power not to just go for it. I guess it's kind of like edging for kissers.

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I'm with ya there, GWT: the "edging" aspects of what me and this guy did were hot as hell. I was very much into it and would have still considered this a GREAT encounter even if he had never kissed me at all.

I am GLAD that lots more guys are into kissing and general affection and passion lately. Seems like in the last three years I've run into this a LOT.

Works for me.

The closeness was great. But I'll admit, as I already have, that I can get off on JUST kissing with nothing else. Not CUM, so to speak, but GET OFF sexually in every other possible way.

As for deprivation... start a thread. I'd LOVE to discuss that. It's something I get into quite often. Blue balls can, indeed, be fun!

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