I belong to a nice suburban healthclub with all the bells and whistles - great work out area, pool, trainers and in the mens' locker room a hot tub, steam and sauna.

I get the sense that the steam room is fairly active. Guys come out with obvious erections under their towels. I can sit in the hot tub directly across from the steam room and observe. I've also been in there when guys have started touching themselves, but it is all so subtle, I never know how to react.

I am not sure I would want to touch anyone in there (too public) but I sure wouldn't mind some across the bench stroking and showing off. What is the best way to let a toucher know I am OK with him touching himself and that he has nothing to "worry about" from me?

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Several ways. Obviously stare as he plays with himself, make and hold eye contact, mimic his every move. When he scratches, adjusts, or exposes, you do the exact same. He will get the message.

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Just get hard.

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At a regular health club, I'm definitely subtle. But if a guy is hard under his towel, or keeps "readjusting" himself, then I'd react by doing the same action. Then let it build from there.

This happened to me a couple weeks ago; the locker room wasn't crowded and a guy who I see often and sort of suspected joined me in the steam room. That time I made a little bit of an overture and sat facing him--back against the side wall of the bench, knees up in front of me, package dangling on the bench. Idle chat. Then when he matched my pose we started gently playing with ourselves.

Could have had a nice jack, which is where you want to go. I was feeling a little more adventurous tho, so I moved over next to him and we played with each other, and sucked each other a little. But you gotta keep an eye on the frosted glass door!

Hope it works out. I'm pretty careful too, but it can be fun. Al

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Yup. Mimicking and matching up the other dude(s) actions will clearly signal that you are the game. So far, this has worked virtually everywhere.

Yet, this is your home turf. And a regular health club should never be confused with a gay spa, where everything goes. Over the time, most dudes will find all the build up and no release rather frustrating. Plus, watching that frosted door and thinking about the consequences of being busted are not precisely conducive to having limitless fun.

So, after making sure that you are on the same page with this other dude, make sure he gets your private cell number. "dude, we can help each other out..." will get some guys calling for more.

You do not need to develop a full-blown (pun???) relationship but a cool buddy on the side can make it truly enjoyable for both of you...

KD

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